Anyways, I am going to be talking about a little thing called LOVE. Thats right I said it, love. I use this word a million times a day. My use of the word ranges from "I LOVE this song"to "I LOVE Chipotle". Sometimes I think I over use this word, and I know I am not the only one. Do we truly love these things? I don't know, but lets start off with the Webster's definition shall we?
Love: An intense feeling of deep affection.
Okay, Yeah, I guess we could say thats what love is. I don't know though because I feel like it leaves out a lot of the other details. I think love feels a little more like a sickness sometimes. Like sometimes when you love someone you can't eat, sleep, and sometimes it gives you the worse pain imaginable. When you get a description like that who wouldn't want to be in love right? The point I am trying to make here is that love is so much BIGGER than we think it is, it can't be put into a little box and anything outside of that box doesn't qualify. There are so many sides to love, so many particles, and pieces that add to the feeling.
Love is something that really can't be defined it is something that one has to define on their own. I have only been in love one and one time only of this I am sure. I know that it doesn't make me an expert on love or anything, but to me love is this cluster of things that add up to one feeling. Love to me is unselfish, patient, forgiving, and most importantly it never gives up.
Being unselfish is something that is really hard for almost everyone to do. Lets face it we ALL want to have it our way. We all have things that we really want and there is nothing wrong with that, but there is a little problem with that when there is more than one person involved. So we have this thing called compromise, which some of us master and some of us not so much. When I was younger I honestly did not understand what compromise was. All I cared about was what Jamee wanted and that's how it was going to be. When love is involved you kind of stop caring about what YOU need, but what they need. You start to be okay with meeting in the middle and compromises. Yeah, maybe you didn't get to have it ALL your way, but making the other happy is good enough. I have to admit there was a LONG road to compromise with me, but, when love inched its way in it was more about them being happy, and getting what they needed and less about what I wanted or what I needed.
Love is patient. You can be madly in love with someone, and they can drive you completely crazy. Sometimes it is the little things like not using correct grammar, or listening to the little details of a story. Sometimes it's the BIG things like putting up with a bad mood or a bad day. Whatever it is love is patient. Patience and I have a bit of a complicated relationship. I react very quickly and often times want things to happen right now, but unfortunately it doesn't always work like that. When you have dated the most stubborn, challenging person only then will you develop that beloved concept of patience. Sometimes it is not even a choice it just happens, and believe it or not it gets a little easier. You may be patient and slow to speak when they are having a bad day. You may show patience when they need time or space to think. Sometimes sitting back and showing a little patience can be the best act of love you can give someone.
Love is forgiving. Has anyone ever seen that movie Just Friends and the crazy psycho chick sings a song in the movie that goes "forgiveness is more than sayin' sorry", while she was completely crazy, she was definitely on to something. Forgiveness is more than words, it more of a heart and mental thing. You can say you forgive someone, but you don't. It's hard to forgive, but love can make it a little easier. When you love someone you forgive them for all of their little flaws. When you say sorry you mean it. There is nothing worse than having an argument or discussion and having someone bring up some mistake or issue that you had previously. I must admit I am like an olympic gold medalist in this department. I mean I remember everything, and I love arguing and I love having the last word. As much as I hate to admit it I certainly do bring up previous experiences to win an argument. Love needs to be forgiving it shouldn't take record of wrongs that were done in the past, it's about moving forward and forgiving one another. This is a concept that I have struggled and struggled to master, but there has definitely been success in the struggle. I have realized that no one is perfect and everyone should experience forgiveness. Love to me is forgiveness.
Love NEVER gives up. This is my favorite. It's so easy to give up or want to get out when times get rough or something isn't going exactly according to how you imagined it. Maybe they weren't everything that you wanted them to be, maybe they made a mistake, or maybe we are scared. Love to me never gives up. I am just going to throw this out there. I am a fighter. I mean you can knock me down, but I am going to get back up and keep swinging. I hate giving up. I really hate giving up on people. And most importantly I hate giving up on people I am in love with. Sometimes I think of how much easier it would be to just cash in the chips and call it game, sure fighting can get exhausting, but when you love someone you will keep fighting. Yes, I realize there comes a time when you have to stop fighting for someone or move on, but if it is real to you, if you can't go a day without thinking about it then you should fight. Failure is not an option. You are going to have people around you telling you what you should do and how you feel. Everyone is going to have their opinions and they are going to disapprove. I have experienced it first hand. The little moments of silence when you talk to friends, the vocal disapproval, and the judgey eyes. Sometimes it is enough to start to make you doubt yourself, but you have to ask yourself the question is it worth it? If it is yes than keep fighting and don't walk away.
I am sure you are asking yourself what prompted me to write this. Two things 1. insomnia 2. Simple, I am in love with someone. He isn't perfect, he is nothing I ideally wanted for myself, he can't be romantic if he tried, he drives me crazy with his use of incorrect grammar, he is moody, he doesn't look like Channing Tatum, he is constantly arguing, not all my friends like him and he really doesn't know the right things to say. I know your probably thinking and you are in love with this guy? Yes, while those are all of the things he is not, I can tell you what he is. He is my past. He is constantly challenging me. He argues constantly, but I wouldn't want to argue with anyone else. While he isn't perfect, he fits perfectly with me. He doesn't always say the right things, but he says what I need to hear not what I want to hear. While he isn't Channing Tatum, he certainly has the cutest smile I have ever seen. Not all my friends may like him, but they don't know him. While he isn't romantic, his attempts at being romantic can make me laugh, cry and snort all at once, which to me is the most romantic thing in the world. He isn't perfect, but I love him. He taught me what love was, most importantly he made me want to fight and not give up on something that's why I will NEVER give up on him.
Being unselfish is something that is really hard for almost everyone to do. Lets face it we ALL want to have it our way. We all have things that we really want and there is nothing wrong with that, but there is a little problem with that when there is more than one person involved. So we have this thing called compromise, which some of us master and some of us not so much. When I was younger I honestly did not understand what compromise was. All I cared about was what Jamee wanted and that's how it was going to be. When love is involved you kind of stop caring about what YOU need, but what they need. You start to be okay with meeting in the middle and compromises. Yeah, maybe you didn't get to have it ALL your way, but making the other happy is good enough. I have to admit there was a LONG road to compromise with me, but, when love inched its way in it was more about them being happy, and getting what they needed and less about what I wanted or what I needed.
Love is patient. You can be madly in love with someone, and they can drive you completely crazy. Sometimes it is the little things like not using correct grammar, or listening to the little details of a story. Sometimes it's the BIG things like putting up with a bad mood or a bad day. Whatever it is love is patient. Patience and I have a bit of a complicated relationship. I react very quickly and often times want things to happen right now, but unfortunately it doesn't always work like that. When you have dated the most stubborn, challenging person only then will you develop that beloved concept of patience. Sometimes it is not even a choice it just happens, and believe it or not it gets a little easier. You may be patient and slow to speak when they are having a bad day. You may show patience when they need time or space to think. Sometimes sitting back and showing a little patience can be the best act of love you can give someone.
Love is forgiving. Has anyone ever seen that movie Just Friends and the crazy psycho chick sings a song in the movie that goes "forgiveness is more than sayin' sorry", while she was completely crazy, she was definitely on to something. Forgiveness is more than words, it more of a heart and mental thing. You can say you forgive someone, but you don't. It's hard to forgive, but love can make it a little easier. When you love someone you forgive them for all of their little flaws. When you say sorry you mean it. There is nothing worse than having an argument or discussion and having someone bring up some mistake or issue that you had previously. I must admit I am like an olympic gold medalist in this department. I mean I remember everything, and I love arguing and I love having the last word. As much as I hate to admit it I certainly do bring up previous experiences to win an argument. Love needs to be forgiving it shouldn't take record of wrongs that were done in the past, it's about moving forward and forgiving one another. This is a concept that I have struggled and struggled to master, but there has definitely been success in the struggle. I have realized that no one is perfect and everyone should experience forgiveness. Love to me is forgiveness.
Love NEVER gives up. This is my favorite. It's so easy to give up or want to get out when times get rough or something isn't going exactly according to how you imagined it. Maybe they weren't everything that you wanted them to be, maybe they made a mistake, or maybe we are scared. Love to me never gives up. I am just going to throw this out there. I am a fighter. I mean you can knock me down, but I am going to get back up and keep swinging. I hate giving up. I really hate giving up on people. And most importantly I hate giving up on people I am in love with. Sometimes I think of how much easier it would be to just cash in the chips and call it game, sure fighting can get exhausting, but when you love someone you will keep fighting. Yes, I realize there comes a time when you have to stop fighting for someone or move on, but if it is real to you, if you can't go a day without thinking about it then you should fight. Failure is not an option. You are going to have people around you telling you what you should do and how you feel. Everyone is going to have their opinions and they are going to disapprove. I have experienced it first hand. The little moments of silence when you talk to friends, the vocal disapproval, and the judgey eyes. Sometimes it is enough to start to make you doubt yourself, but you have to ask yourself the question is it worth it? If it is yes than keep fighting and don't walk away.
I am sure you are asking yourself what prompted me to write this. Two things 1. insomnia 2. Simple, I am in love with someone. He isn't perfect, he is nothing I ideally wanted for myself, he can't be romantic if he tried, he drives me crazy with his use of incorrect grammar, he is moody, he doesn't look like Channing Tatum, he is constantly arguing, not all my friends like him and he really doesn't know the right things to say. I know your probably thinking and you are in love with this guy? Yes, while those are all of the things he is not, I can tell you what he is. He is my past. He is constantly challenging me. He argues constantly, but I wouldn't want to argue with anyone else. While he isn't perfect, he fits perfectly with me. He doesn't always say the right things, but he says what I need to hear not what I want to hear. While he isn't Channing Tatum, he certainly has the cutest smile I have ever seen. Not all my friends may like him, but they don't know him. While he isn't romantic, his attempts at being romantic can make me laugh, cry and snort all at once, which to me is the most romantic thing in the world. He isn't perfect, but I love him. He taught me what love was, most importantly he made me want to fight and not give up on something that's why I will NEVER give up on him.
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